How to Beat Depression After Getting Sober
There is no getting around it, beating depression after getting sober is a difficult thing to do. Your old life is gone and with it some acquaintances and hangout spots that you are familiar with and gave you comfort and many a good times. Making the transition to a new you can be scary. It takes time and effort and comes with patience and hard work. If you are like me you spent decades drinking alcohol on a daily basis, for hours each day. We drank either at home, at friends or in pubs and drinking establishments. However, if you are reading this, those good times have made their own transition into bad and alcohol has taken control of your life. Ways of making this transition successfully are multifaceted and slightly different for everyone. In this blog I will explore the different strategies that worked for me and how you can employ them to help with your own transition.
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Table of Contents
Quitting Through Sheer Will Power Doesn’t Work Long Term
Quitting through sheer will power and merely living or existing in sobriety without doing the required amount of personal development work, just doesn’t work long term. New strategies for living in sobriety have to be found, explored and implemented. The change from drinking daily to not at all is profound and you have to find new ways to live.
Finding the New You
Focusing on finding the new you is a great way to make this transition a positive experience. Think about all the things you want to do and experience. All of the things your new found health, wealth and free time will allow you to do. Make lists and set reasonable goals for the new you. You will have more time, money and energy in your new life. What would you like to experience? What would you like to explore? You can also rediscover old passions that you had before alcohol became all consuming. In the process of working through the following strategies, hopefully you can expose and deal with the root cause of your alcohol addiction and truly realize the potential of the new you.
Strategies on Beating Depression After Getting Sober
- Do The Wim Hoff Method breathing exercises. This is a life changer! It helps with stress, anxiety and sleep along with many other benefits.
- Take a cold shower or plunge every day. This is excellent for stress relief and is a great way to get a dopamine boost! To get started, read about The Benefits of and How to do Tummo/Wim Hoff Breathing and Cold Water Therapy.
- Start doing affirmations. Keep them positive and end them with thriving in sobriety. For example, ‘I am healthy thriving in sobriety’. And don’t just mindlessly say the affirmations. While repeating the affirmation think about what it means to you, what barriers are in place that are stopping you from achieving that affirmation and what you have to do to overcome those barriers and realize that affirmation. To use the above example – what do you consider healthy and how would you like to be healthy, what is stopping you from being healthy and how do you overcome those barriers to become healthy. My personal affirmation is ‘I am happy, humorous and healthy, virile, wise and wealthy thriving in complete sobriety’. Feel free to use mine or parts of mine but also come up with some of your own.
- One of the most important things you must do is convince yourself that alcohol brings you pain, and not just pain but massive amounts of pain. The insidious and difficult thing about alcohol is that it does, in the short term, bring pleasure. The first few drinks of alcohol triggers a release of endorphins – chemicals that bring feelings of pleasure – and after years of drinking this is ingrained in your brain. To break this pattern you need to stop drinking for one, but you also need to think deeply about how alcohol has brought you pain and how abstaining will bring you pleasure. Affirmations are meant to be positive but you can turn this into an affirmation of sorts. Remind yourself daily of all the different ways alcohol brings you pain and how quitting will both stop that pain and bring you pleasure. As time goes by it is best to focus on your positive affirmations and how thriving in sobriety brings you pleasure. But, at the beginning you need to remind yourself why you are quitting on a daily, if not hourly, basis.
- Read The 30 Day Sobriety Solution: How to Cut Back or Quit Drinking in the Privacy of your Own Home and DO THE SOLUTIONS! This is a must read book for anyone trying to quit drinking on their own.
- Read the BIG BOOK from AA. This is a great resources even if you don’t want to go to AA. The Big Book has a great explanation of what alcoholism is and lots of good stories and strategies to help you with your sobriety journey.
- If you relapse and fall off the wagon, don’t be too hard on yourself. Refocus, regroup, identify what caused your relapse and try again. Do this as many times as it takes. I quit more than 30 times before quitting for good.
- Start a moving mindfulness meditation practice such as yoga or tai chi. You can find lots of free resources on the web or go to a class.
- Get a good nights rest. Follow these recommendations from Huberman labs Toolkit for Sleep.
- Eat a Whole Food Plant Based Diet. The key word here is WHOLE FOODS, try to eat as many actual foods as possible. To get started, you can find some free, useful information here.
- Take a probiotic supplement, eat probiotic foods such as sauerkraut, kimchee and yogurt and drink kombucha to re-establish a healthy gut biome.
- Take a good multivitamin and drink a high quality green nutrient drink to replace depleted vitamins and minerals that alcohol consumption causes.
- Make sure to get your Omega-3s by eating high quality fish and flax seeds and taking algae or fish oil.
- Find a fun, active, healthy hobby. Something you can pursue that you will do better at when you are sober and fit. As you may have guessed, I love stand up paddle boarding, surfing and yoga.
- Strive to become more mindful. Along with moving mindfulness practices do some research on the subject and try some different meditation strategies. The best book I have read on mindfulness is The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.
- Keep vigilant and continue with your affirmations and sobriety strategies.
- Be forgiving, especially with yourself.
- Be compassionate, especially with yourself.
- Be grateful.
Some Statistics to Help You Beat Depression After Getting Sober
- Worldwide, 3 million deaths every year result from harmful use of alcohol.
- According to the NIAAA, in the US, an estimated 95,000 people (approximately 68,000 men and 27,000 women) die from alcohol-related causes annually, making alcohol the third-leading preventable cause of death in the United States. The first is tobacco, and the second is poor diet and physical inactivity.
- In 2019, of the 85,688 liver disease deaths among individuals ages 12 and older, 43.1 percent involved alcohol. Among males, 53,486 liver disease deaths occurred, and 45.6 percent involved alcohol. Among females, 32,202 liver disease deaths occurred, and 39.0 percent involved alcohol.
- From 2010 to 2016, alcohol-related liver disease was the primary cause of almost 1 in 3 liver transplants in the United States, replacing hepatitis C virus infection as the leading cause of liver transplantation due to chronic liver disease.
Research has shown that people who misuse alcohol have a greater risk of liver disease, heart disease, depression, stroke, and stomach bleeding, as well as cancers of the oral cavity, esophagus, larynx, pharynx, liver, colon, and rectum. These individuals may also have problems managing conditions such as diabetes, high blood pressure, pain, and sleep disorders. They may (I’m going to say definitely!) increase their likelihood of unsafe sexual behavior.
- Alcohol consumption is associated with increased risk of drowning and injuries from violence, falls, and motor vehicle crashes. Alcohol consumption is also associated with an increased risk of female breast cancer, oropharyngeal cancer, esophageal cancer (especially in individuals who inherit a deficiency in an enzyme involved in alcohol metabolism), and harmful medication interactions. Alcohol consumption has been linked to risk for FASD in the offspring of women who consume alcohol during pregnancy
I wish you the best of luck. My life has changed for the better in every possible way since becoming sober. Getting sober is merely the first step in a life long journey to thriving in sobriety. Thankfully we can look forward to all the new ways in which we can enjoy life without alcohol. While we might be missing out on having beers with buds at the local watering hole, there are so many more meaningful, enjoyable and rewarding activities, hobbies and relationships we can build and explore through a sober life.
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Hello Pat
I was talking with Bernie today and he told me about your blog which I’m finding profoundly reassuring. Your dad and I have been friends since starting law school in 1969 and am familiar with the family history. I am also an alcoholic who stopped drinking, in my case nineteen years ago but the desire to drink is never far away. I have to remind myself regularly of the reasons I quit in the first place. I knew you and your brothers when you were wee boys and I am so moved to know that you have a fulfilling and productive life. Good on you. One day at a time. In my case, I went to AA meetings for ten years before moving to the country and I miss the fellowship. Keep it up. God bless, always.
Hello Alex,
Thank you so much for your kind words and for the reminder that, even after 19 years, the desire to drink is never far away. Reiterating the importance of remembering why we quit and keeping up with our sobriety strategies, whatever they may be. And good on you as well! Nineteen years is a phenomenal achievement. I am glad the AA meetings worked out for you as they have for so many others. I have faint childhood memories of you and dad mentions you often enough that I am familiar with your close friendship and, after just speaking with him, some aspects of your interesting life.
Thanks again for taking the time to read some of my blogs and your kind comments.
All the best,
Pat
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